Que Sera Sera

Text messages saved in my cell phone, vol. 4

(cf: vol. 1, 2, and 3)

Sorry I didn’t call last night. I got into a fight with some punkass in a bear costume.

Did you get my email re: Steveland Hardaway Judkins Morris?

Whoa. Are you like skeksi lord chamberlain now or something?

We all drink our blood one vial at a time.

That is fuckin awesome with a FUCKIN A

16 is legal in Oklahoma Sarah.

John Mailer just asked me out for a beer! And I turned him down!

Like riding the hawkman rocket-cycle at the end of “Flash Gordon”

Dude who the fuck are you

If I kept track of everytime I got bit, I’d need shots.

Fucking A, Sarah Brown. I’m a total asshole?

My new thing: poppers and joles. For hours.

John Candy tour de force. His medallion? Genius.

Her name is Tiffany and she used to have a penis.

To touch a unicorn is forbidden, Lily!

Im going to sock u with a tangerine when u get home.

Do you think any of us will suddenly find Jesus and totally change?

Like Sammy, only faker. Got it.

I am at a party with the hot dog eating champion! And the black widow and spider legs! The biggest names in eating contests really.

Midget sex and GHB. You?

Very interesting. I like to call it the “high road.”

I love drunk scientists! I’m in Tulsa!

Girls into black guys here but not w/me

You want to be knocked around later or should I go to bed?

I’d like to be worth a damn.

Jesus christmas I’ve done a lot of bragging on your part in the last 4 hours

Fishnets. Duct tape. Prospect Park.

Oh, it’s on. Invite all the hesher dudes you know.

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